Who Am I? #2

What does it all mean?


In the last re-versioning exercise, I explored my favorite things, and found some surprises on my list: professional projects from 20 years ago; new (and old) passions; vocations and avocations; places I’d seen and explored around the world. Even things I tried a little of and always wanted to do more of, but never “had the time.”

As we say in the training biz, I “compared and contrasted” my favorite things, and I noticed something: there were skills that many of the things had in common. And – surprise – there were elements of the things I’m consciously most interested in everywhere.

My “favorite things” list came out of playing and thinking about the past. But before I could step forward into the future, it seemed like I needed to take stock of What Is Now. This is that exercise.


Skills and interests

I looked at my list of favorite things I’ve done – work, personal, interactive – and compiled two more lists: a list of skills, things I think I can do well; and a list of interests, things I knew about or wanted to know more about, or “always wanted to do.” It was pretty “listy,” but you already know I love lists and words.

The “skills” list helped me condense a lot of the ideas that had been floating around in my head into some concrete, simpler things that I knew about myself: creativity; listening; organizing (lists!); planning.

The “interests” list was more subject-like, almost a list of college class titles from an Ideal University of You: learning to watercolor; mental health and physiology; ancient and cultural history. They weren’t all “egghead” things, either: horses and dressage were in there, as well as how things work and engaging in my community.

At this point, I felt like I was done already with raw material. It was time to head for the future.


I hear you: "But I hate making lists!”

If you feel frustrated sitting by yourself and listing all this stuff – or if your lists aren’t too satisfying – here’s an exercise to help you find your skills and interests.

You’ll need at least three people to do this exercise.
• Friend #1 is your Recorder. This friend will time this exercise, ask the questions, and write down or otherwise record your responses.
• Friend #2 is the Reality Foil. This friend will work with Friend #1 first, then with all three of you, to complete the exercise. Both of these people should be very good, honest friends (See “Choosing your Board of Directors”). (You may have more than one Foil if you want, but I would start with one first.)
• You.

You will also need:
• Paper and pens OR a voice recorder
• A watch with a second hand and an alarm or a stop watch or alarm clock that can mark brief periods of time (like 2 minutes)
• A place for you or your Reality Foil to sit without being able to hear the others. Doesn’t have to be a recording studio – if you’re sitting inside the house, have the Foil go out in the yard, or vice versa.

Here’s the exercise.


STEP 1:
1. Sit in a quiet space or place with the Recorder. Have nothing in your hands or around you to distract you. Sit for as long as you need to relax, to stop thinking about what you need to do next. You need to do this now.

2. The Recorder sets the timepiece for 2 minutes, prepares to write, and asks you: In simple words or phrases, how would you describe yourself?

3. Answer the question, with the first thinks that come to your mind. Don’t stop. The point of this isn’t a “right” answer; it’s to access some stuff you may not be aware of.

4. The Recorder writes everything down as fast as possible, using a short hand if necessary. No talking about your answer: the Recorder simply records as neutrally as possible.

5. If you stop talking, the Recorder will tell you, “Go on.”

6. If you’re still going strong after 2 minutes, the Recorder will let you go.

7. You can stop any time after the alarm goes off.

You’re done. Go sit and relax, and send in the Reality Foil.


STEP 2:
1. The Recorder repeats the exercise with the Foil, asking, “In simple words or phrases, how would you describe [You]?”

2. Foil: No talking about You. Just record the answers as neutrally as possible. And same rules on the timing: Keep the other person talking, and end after 2 minutes.

3. The Recorder brings You into the room. All you have to do for now is look at the two lists, and ask the Recorder or your Reality Foil any questions you have about the content, if you have any.

4. Keep the lists, thank your friends, and go out for coffee to celebrate.

OR:

This next part of the exercise you can do immediately after the steps above, or you may want to take time to think about it before you share your thoughts with your friends. Or not.


STEP 3:
1. Look at your list. What surprises you about the order in which you described yourself? What did you “forget” to state that you think is obvious now that the exercise is over? What do you want to add? (If you add anything, use a different color pen or otherwise indicate, “These words came later.”)

2. Look at your Reality Foil’s list. What surprises you about the content of the list? The order of the descriptions? How do you feel looking at this list?

3. Compare the two lists. What do they have in common? What is different? What does your Reality Foil see that you want to be more of? What does the Foil not see that you want to make more obvious?

4. Think about all these lists and words and questions. What does it tell you about how you see yourself in the world? About how the world sees you? What does it tell you about how you want the world to see you in the future – and how you want to see yourself?

5. Given the answers to the questions above: What most interests you in the world? What skills do you bring to the table?



I hear you #2: “But my friends won’t help!” or “I can’t ask my friends!” or “I don’t have any friends!”

We’ll work on some of those issues later. Meantime, here’s another fun way to investigate your skills and interests.

Presto! You are now the President of an amazing institution: You University (a.k.a. You U).

As I am the head of You U’s Board of Directors – your Virtual CEO, I guess – here’s your assignment:


Write the foundational curriculum for all new You U students who enter the university.


What’s in a curriculum? I want to see a couple of things:
• Department Titles: What are the main areas of interest where we need to hire professors, do research, enlighten students? Start with those.

• Required Classes: In each Department, what subjects, skills, and attitudes that you think each You U student must achieve in order to be successful in this world? In short, what are the basics that you feel are most important?

• Elective Classes: Now, what are the subjects and skills and attitudes that You U students might also want to learn? What else might be helpful for our students’ success?

• The Head Professor’s Resume: Write the job description for the Head Professor who will be able to help run You U. Now, secretly you want to apply for the Head Professor position, so write the job description including all of the skills that you already have. That way, when the position is filled, they’ll have to select you! (ha-ha-ha evil laughter here)


Now, this is your first draft, so don’t feel like you have to write the whole course catalog. But spend enough time on it to be able to show something substantial to your board.

Done? Leave it be for a few hours/days. Then head back and look it over. Make two columns on a piece of paper, one headed “Skills” and the other “Interests.” Use your curriculum information to identify both and create your lists.


The past, the present – now comes the fun part: the future.